Sitting here watching my new favorite golfer Erik Compton. Found out about him in a story on HBO Real Sports. He's a double heart transplant recipient and he's out on the PGA tour. I've been needing those kinds of stories lately. Things have been getting a little tougher overall. Been having trouble sleeping, which is probably the reason I'm up at 2 am writing a blog! It's also been getting harder and harder to control the water weight. I think I'm getting closer to getting the PICC line IV and the stronger drugs. The upside to that is at least I'd move up in status on the list. But the obvious downside is running around with an IV in my arm all the damn time. Fun fun.
It's just generally been harder for me to not let my natural tendency to sink into my little woe-is-me-slumpiness. That's why it's nice to see stuff about people like Erick, who are on the other side of it and doing well. To use a wellworn cliche, I'm pretty damn tired of being so damn sick and tired. Seems like laying around in bed watching TV all the time would be GREAT! But I am rapidly approaching my fill.
One thing that is taking my time is planning the benefit. It's Oct 9 and we are getting some great ideas together. It's going to be a great day and hopefully we'll be able to raise some good money from it. I'll blog all the details when everything is nailed down and I'll let ya'll know how to get tickets.
Alright. Big love to all. Think I may go see if I can actually sleep. Until next time America....
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Friday, July 9, 2010
Don't read this. No, really. Don't.
I know I haven't posted in awhile. I wish I could say that it was because I was so busy with fun activities with the family or something great like that. Even better, that I hadn't been posting because I was in the hospital with the surgery already. But no. It's just that I've been feeling pretty crappy lately.
I hope this doesn't end up coming off like some kind of whine fest (free tastes at every whinery!!). As much as I started this blog to keep everyone informed, it's also a bit therapeutic. Even though there are only a couple of people listening; hi Ashley; somehow yelling into the abyss of cyberspace feels good. Ok, disclaimer over.
I have been having issues with keeping the wonderfully delicate balance of fluid intake/output regulated correctly. We recently had to add an even stronger diuretic into my medicinal mix. Fun, fun.
I love that such a large part of my life now centers on how much I can pee in a day. Things have been reduced to a measurement of what-goes-in vs. what-comes-out. It's all starting to get depressing in the utter monotony. Sometimes I feel like I'm going a little crazy with it all.
It's hard being sick, for everyone. The kids want to do things and go places and I never seem to feel like it. Even when I do, I always peter out way too fast. I feel like they're getting screwed out of their summer.
Khristina doesn't have it any easier. She's the one who ends up having to take care of the entertainment and getting things done. I'm no good for giving her any kind of break lately. She's taking up all the slack, literally and in the end all she's left with is a husband who either wants to sleep or...... well sleep.
I feel like I could stay in bed 95% of the time. I've always liked to sleep late, but lately I just want to sleep all the time. Of course, when I do lay down it starts to get uncomfortable (see the earlier part of this about the fluid retention). Kinda screwed either way.
Told ya this was gonna be pitiful. Sorry. Maybe next time I should wait for a slightly better day.....
I hope this doesn't end up coming off like some kind of whine fest (free tastes at every whinery!!). As much as I started this blog to keep everyone informed, it's also a bit therapeutic. Even though there are only a couple of people listening; hi Ashley; somehow yelling into the abyss of cyberspace feels good. Ok, disclaimer over.
I have been having issues with keeping the wonderfully delicate balance of fluid intake/output regulated correctly. We recently had to add an even stronger diuretic into my medicinal mix. Fun, fun.
I love that such a large part of my life now centers on how much I can pee in a day. Things have been reduced to a measurement of what-goes-in vs. what-comes-out. It's all starting to get depressing in the utter monotony. Sometimes I feel like I'm going a little crazy with it all.
It's hard being sick, for everyone. The kids want to do things and go places and I never seem to feel like it. Even when I do, I always peter out way too fast. I feel like they're getting screwed out of their summer.
Khristina doesn't have it any easier. She's the one who ends up having to take care of the entertainment and getting things done. I'm no good for giving her any kind of break lately. She's taking up all the slack, literally and in the end all she's left with is a husband who either wants to sleep or...... well sleep.
I feel like I could stay in bed 95% of the time. I've always liked to sleep late, but lately I just want to sleep all the time. Of course, when I do lay down it starts to get uncomfortable (see the earlier part of this about the fluid retention). Kinda screwed either way.
Told ya this was gonna be pitiful. Sorry. Maybe next time I should wait for a slightly better day.....
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